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what are you working on today, herr doktor? my new project, my boy, having to do with string. . . . string theory? great! the end of particle physics! yes, well, you see. . . you've made a new breakthrough? well, in a sense. a new theory of relativity, no doubt? er. . . doktor, you are a genius! yes, well, see, I have a this nice ball of string. see? a ball of string? why are you showing me that? it's all in one ball. what does this have to do with quantum field theory? nothing! but the cat likes to play with it. the cat? isn't she cute? totally.

it's important to have a plan. why do we need a plan? that's what it says here. what's that? it's an owner's manual. let's see it. dude. it's for a dishwasher! yes, but I believe it has universal application. sure it would, if you're worried about water spots. vigilance is the bedrock of preparation. is that in there too? not in so many words. thought not.

hey, buddy, what day is it? why, it's sunday, of course. a lot of people in there. how come? this is a church. they're praying. oh yeah? say, can I come in? why certainly. all are welcome here. I need a few bucks. got any spare change? we prefer not to have panhandlers in here. and I prefer not to pray on an empty stomach, ya know? the lord hears all prayers. even if this church don't, right? you may have a point there.

is this where it happened? yeah, up in the bell tower. what was he doing up there? he was afraid of heights and didn't want to go. but I told him that he had to face his fears. did he? he did. and then he fell. I guess his fears were pretty realistic, then. yeah, he was a very rational kind of guy. not that it did him much good, I guess. no, not so much.

grab a board, dude. good 8-footers out there. I don't know, man, could get kinda hairy. you're not gonna make me do this alone, are you? no, but this is charlie's beach! charlie don't surf! seems to me I've heard that somewhere before. could be.

time to move on, baby. why, charley? I like it here. gotta get some money, baby. It's been 2 months. how you gonna get money, charley? gonna get it from the bank, sugar, just like always. promise me you won't get caught, like last time? not a chance, baby. you were away for 4 long years, charley. me and the boys will be more careful this time, don't worry. get me a nice dress, ok charley? you got it, toots.

I've just returned from earth, archangel. oh? was it an enjoyable trip, lord? yes and no. it certainly is a beautiful place. one of your best works, lord. with the possible exception of humans, maybe. I don't know. I still believe in them, lord. for your sake, I hope your belief is warranted. regardless, I've instructed Michael to suit up. no! Michael? but there's only one thing he knows how to do! yes, I know, but a certain amount of cage rattling is called for, seems to me. but Michael? he doesn't just rattle the cage. he blows the whole thing up! that is his specialty, true. sometimes I envy his power, although that's not my style. I like your style, archangel. I like yours too, lord. I should hope so.

which way should we go? I dunno. you choose. how about we just make footprints in the sand. see where that takes us? works for me.

you know, there's no other world I'd rather be on, right now. you should know. you've been on a few. but I found you here. stop, you're making my tentacles quiver. I know. I love it when that happens. me too.

how are you today, lord? excellent, archangel. how goes it? I just want to thank you, lord. awesome work last night. what's that? the sunset on earth. I thought it was particularly well done. even for you. oh, yes. company was over. I may have gone a little overboard. it happens. who were you entertaining? just a few old pals. thor. zeus, and his wife. hera? you two get along? after that little. . . thing between you?that didn't turn out so well. oh, that's all in the past. we behaved like adults. not adult humans, I hope. humans? ha ha. no, we are actually mature beings. supreme beings, maybe, but nonetheless mature. adult humans. good one. you had me worried there for a moment. it would have been quite comical, I admit. ridiculously so, lord.

how do you like my new pad? awesome, isn't it? please tell me you don't live here. please. whaddya mean? it's got everything I need. like fresh water, for one. I can see that. hey! I'm growing sprouts. and ganja weed too, no doubt. that sort of goes without saying. it's part of my bohemian lifestyle. bohemian? more like homeless, if you ask me. well, I did ask. which I now regret. me too. but don't bogart that joint

what can you see? what I want in this world. you can? I don't see anything. you can't see what I can. what's that? you.

don't you have anything to say? I would. but I've lost the power of speech. that's what I like to hear.

are you coming to church today? I would, but your church was kinda weird last week. what do you mean, weird? man, it was like they were speaking another language. oh, yeah, it gets like that sometimes. cool, eh? not so much. I felt like I was trapped with a bunch of aliens. yeah? maybe you were. for real? but don't tell anybody. if you do, we'll know. that sounds kind of scary, dude. I'm just saying, be careful, if you receive my meaning. my antennae are picking you up loud and clear. you have antennae too? uh, no, I don't, actually. do you? of course, but I don't brag about it. probably a good idea.

where are we? I dunno. we'll follow these tracks. which way though? we'll flip a coin. maybe we'll get lucky. I'm broke. you got any change? shit! I'm out too. ok, you choose. I say we go that way. are you nuts? we need to go THAT way, man. you said I get to choose! yeah, until you chose wrong.

good evening, lord. how are you, archangel? oh, I've been better, thank you. what seems to be the problem? well, now that summer is over, I miss my boat. your boat? yes, sailing on my favorite lake on earth. I miss it. well, I don't blame you. but summer will return. but I have to take my boat out of the water before winter. so? man, I hate having to do that. why don't you just cruise it down to the florida keys? that would be so tempting, lord, I know. so why not? well, would you, um, would you. . . crew for me? me? all my angels are busy on assignment. I can't do it alone. you want me to crew for you on your boat? I'll bring the margarita mix. it'll be great. you know I don't drink. of course, lord. it would be just for show. ok. let's get it done. snow's about to fall in michigan. you got it, lord. but you owe me, archangel. don't I always, lord? that's true.

it's refusing to speak. well, do something! I've tried every language I know, even mandarin. how about cantonese? that's an excellent idea. let's get some carry-out. cool. moo shoo gai pork for me. good.

here it is. it finally arrived. the end of august. the end of another summer, dammit. it sucks all right. but it's going out with a bang. not much of a consolation, you ask me. I'll pass your disappointment on to the lord, next time I see him. do that, would you? you bet.