B/W and monochrome

you know, there's no other world I'd rather be on, right now. you should know. you've been on a few. but I found you here. stop, you're making my tentacles quiver. I know. I love it when that happens. me too.

hey, is paulie home? yes, but he don't want to see you. go away. whaddya mean? he doesn't want to see me? you heard me. beat it. but why? I don't know, and I don't care. man, that's tough. are you sure? yeah, I'm sure. he called you a bunch of bad names. very bad in fact. that don't mean nothing. when did he do that? last night. in his sleep. he was talking in his sleep? that's what you heard? yeah. I guess. and that's why you think he don't wanna see me? well you know what they say. dreams are a portal to the soul. those are eyes, moron. oh. really? jesus. what's paulie doing now? he's sleeping. figures. and talking about you.

this is where we're meeting gino? yeah. and the boss says don't be late. geez, it's huge. where we meetin' him? I dunno. first we gotta figure out how to get in. yeah, there ain't exactly a valet. no room service either.

lord, a moment of your time? hello, archangel. what can I do for you? your creatures from arcturus are visiting earth, lord. you called them 'creatures? well, you know I can't relate to them. I made them, archangel. yes, but those hideous tentacles, and exoskeletons, and, and. . . try walking in their shoes, for once, archangel. they don't wear shoes! they have no feet! I meant that rhetorically, of course. slithering mucousy globules! I don't know WHAT the heck they are! respect others, archangel, remember? lord, they are about as 'other' as you can get. yes, I was on a bit of a binge when I made them, I guess. lord, when you go on a binge, you go all the way. thanks, I think.

don't stand too close. why not? just a suggestion. you're about to witness the effects of gravity. oh? what effects are those? the effect of not paying what you owe. that sounds kinda ominous. and what about all these people around here? you ever hear of collateral damage? you mean. . . that's why I suggest you don't stand too close. yeah. well, safety first, I always say. me too.

well, it's you, agent 409. it's nice to see you again, not that you bothered to keep us informed of your whereabouts. where have you been? in deep cover, sir. deep, deep cover. did you say deep? I did sir. very deep indeed. well let's hear your report. I would be happy to do so, sir. but she. . . would not appreciate it. did you say, 'she'? it's complicated, sir. cute. but complicated.

master, the humans are advancing on us. good. the final battle is about to begin. shall I prepare the troops? yes. wings spread. mandibles razor sharp. yes, master. earth will soon be ours. I presume the larvae have completed their burrowing? they are beneath the humans' forces, sire. release the arachnids then. they'll crush them from behind. then we feast. I'm hungry now, master. when this is done, you'll be bloated for weeks. I'm twitching in anticipation, o wise one. yes, well, twitch somewhere else, centurion. of course, sire.

why the long face? I got called to appear before the chamber. man. that's tough. you're as good as convicted. I didn't do it! I'm innocent! yeah, maybe. but you did something, sometime, didn't you. yeah. so? see you in 20 years. really? yeah. mind if I take your car? mine kinda quit on me. times are tough, eh? tell me about it.

hey, comrade arkady! did you hear the good news? no, what's that, sergei? I got my dacha back! over by Sevastopol! we're going to party hardy now, I can tell you. that's great, sergei. say, can I move my trailer there? you vacation in a trailer, arkady? no, man. I live in a trailer. and it's fucking cold in Moscow. times are tough, eh? not for all of us, it appears. hey, cry me a river, why don't you?

can I turn around yet? no, I'm not done. how much longer. I'm in no rush. good to know.

what can you tell us about yourself? there's not much to tell. we are quite sure that is not true. just a simple guy is all. we have very detailed files on you. all fiction, I'm afraid. we are not so sure. got any coffee? will you talk if we bring you a cup? no, but it would be nice. you are difficult to understand. that's what my girlfriend always said. not a surprise.

how'd you get here? from over there. no way. nobody's ever come from there. And that's just the way I like it. figures.

we gonna set the trap right here. cool. how's it gonna work? zombies love this place. they come through here all the time. we gonna give 'em something they can't refuse. and then: pow! no more zombies. a trap, huh? yeah. using bait. awesome. what kind of bait? well, you see, that's where you come in. me? how's that? you the bait. what? I'm gonna be zombie bait? why me? because you are the one I can convince to do it. don't worry, I'll be right here. promise? I'll be just outside, in my car. your car!? no way! it won't be a problem. well, if you're sure. totally. we gonna blast some zombies tonight.

how do you like my new invention? what's it do? you see all this? this. . . devastation? yeah, I see it. so what? that's what it does. no offense, but I'm not sure we need your invention. we can do this pretty much by ourselves. yes, I was hoping you wouldn't notice. well, we've been trying not to notice for like 40 years. how's that working out for you so far? kind of messily, I think. that's good, if you like messes. apparently, we do.

you know where we're headed? don't care. how come? I'm just along for the ride. with me? you got it.

come see what I've unearthed, my boy! isn't it exciting? what are they, doktor? obviously, these ancient timbers are all that remains of an indigenous civilization that dwelt on these shores. miraculously, they've somehow survived for millennia. gee. that's old. what was their purpose? they appear to be religious artifacts or symbols. no doubt for use in worshipping some bogus sky god or other. so these people were completely ignorant and backward, right? oh yes. they would have had only a very rudimentary understanding of the nature of the universe and their place in it. I guess mankind has come a long way since then. without a doubt, praise the lord. to whom all praise is due? naturally.

earth is warming, lord. so I've heard, archangel.humans have been trying to ignore the issue. they won't be able to do so much longer though, will they. no, but that's up to them. by the way, the new world I'm creating will never have those problems. the denizens will be self-regulating. how so, lord? simple. I've embedded a code into the cytoplasm of all living things, to prevent the kind of hard-headed self-defeating stupidity that humans can't seem to overcome. I'm ready to launch it, although it will have to percolate for a few thousand generations. good thing we have time, isn't it lord? time, yes. one of my weirder creations. good for knowing when the next football game is being played. true. not that I bet on them, of course. of course not, lord.

do you have a map? map? I have no need of maps. I have a perfect sense of direction. oh? how's your sense of time? somewhat limited, I'm afraid. so that's why we've been wandering in these woods for days? have we? could be. definitely could be.