B/W and monochrome

isn't it time for lunch, stanley? now that you mention it, edna, I believe it is. I'm hungry. what is cook preparing for us? I really don't know. what would you like him to make? oh, something simple. coq au vin perhaps. excellent idea. where would you like it served, dear? in the small dining room, I think. it's a casual day. the bone china and sterling service? and crystal, of course. after all, we aren't savages. indeed not dear.

are you cold? I don't mind. me neither.

hey buddy, you can't park here. no? sez who? sez me. this is a no parking zone. yeah? well, what if I don't believe in zones? then what? then you get towed, is what. plus a $100 fine. well, if you must know, I have places to be anyway. I bet you do.

need a lift? uh, yeah, but. . . where's the horse? the what? the horse. to pull that wagon. horse? we don't got no horse. well how you gonna get it to move? I just say, ookalaaka ookalaaka. then it moves. are you serious? serious. and that's where we're from. sirius. you're from sirius? like you're an alien? yeah. me and him. the thing you called a wagon. it's not a wagon? no, actually, he's my boss. name's flavio. this things alive? as alive as you or me. but it just looks like a broken down old wagon. yeah. great disguise, isn't it? and I suppose you have a disguise too? you are correct. right. then prove it. ok. here we go. I'll just take this mask off. . . there. OH MY GOD!!! YOU'RE A LIZARD!!! well, actually, we call ourselves Remnatts. HOLY SHIT!!! you. . . still want that ride? oh, uh, yeah, sure. thanks. don't mention it. say, you got any spare flies or bugs? uh, no, sorry. that's ok. just a little hungry is all.

it's important to have a plan. why do we need a plan? that's what it says here. what's that? it's an owner's manual. let's see it. dude. it's for a dishwasher! yes, but I believe it has universal application. sure it would, if you're worried about water spots. vigilance is the bedrock of preparation. is that in there too? not in so many words. thought not.

I sometimes miss the royal family. what are you talking about? they fed off the people. maybe. but even so, they had a certain. . . charm. charm my ass. they kept us in the mud for centuries. yes, I suppose we're much better off now, comrade. of course we are. look around. it's a workers' paradise. yes, I'm sure you're right. and you can move up in the committee. yeah? then what? then you are rewarded, of course. what's that got to do with the working class? initiative, my boy. it just takes initiative. that's bullshit. it's all about ass-kissing. I wouldn't say that too loudly, I was you. I say it every chance I get. to the party chairman. no way. my uncle. as bureaucratic as they come. I'm sure he appreciates your insight. that's what family's all about. truly.

sire, think the humans will buy that title? cookie oven? ha ha. all those stupid humans ever think about is their sugar. they have no idea that this is in fact a weapon of mass destruction. ha ha! well, they'll soon find out, won't they. yes. launch the missiles now! yes sire. care for some candy? oh yes. I like candy. me too, sire. stupid humans.

I give up. what is it you give up? everything. about time.

can you believe the gall of that guy? what guy, lord? ba'al. writing to tell me I'm behind in my payments. payments? for that little cottage he sold me a while back. well, are you behind on the payments? damn right I am! the place is a dump! then why did you buy it? he sweet-talked me into it. that charlatan! you let him talk you into buying a house? I know! I know! I should have taken care of him long ago. maybe the house can be fixed up? it would take an act of God to do that. well. . . oh, right. well, I meant that, you know, rhetorically. of course, lord.

this is your ride home. where? all I see is this pointy building. it IS the building, you moron. now move it. and don't forget to show your ticket. what? I gotta have a ticket to get home? don't tell me you didn't bring it. yes, you need a ticket and you altair4 photo ID. shit! can't I just take off my mask and show that it's the real me? you're on earth, idiot. we can't risk having your tentacles waving around in front of these humans. hey, they might like it. right. next in line!

are you ready for your towel? yes, thanks. sorry, but I'm not. well, just let me know. it'll be awhile. no problem. good.

sadness has a history? I'm sure it does. well then, when did it start? I don't know. but someone must have invented it. then someone else invented the cure. yeah? who? actually, I think it was you. when did I do that? when I met you.

you gonna swim there? me? no way, brother. too damn far. no it's not. you can see it from here. you swim then. I'm waiting for the boat. cops might get here before it does. I'll take my chances. not me. I'm going now, while it's still light. suit yourself. but watch out for the barracudas. the what? mean sons a bitches. tear your leg right off. you lie. there's no barracudas out there. don't believe me then. hop on in. what time you say the boat's getting here? any time now. I'll wait. I like being in one piece. thought you do.

johnny said little e got beat on last night. who done it? johnny say it was the crips and their boys. now why they wanna go and do that to a blood? why? cuz they lookin' to get their asses whupped, I guess. damn straight. go get omar and tank and bring 'em here. what we gonna do? we gonna remind the crips this is our turf. how we gonna do that? some gentle persuasion. well, maybe not that gentle. got it.

hey man, mind if I get out of the storm for a second? not at all, you may take refuge here. thanks. I owe you one. that's true. but we are patient. what do you mean? that was just an expression. oh, we take it quite seriously here. here? where am I? the one place where your immortal soul can find shelter. well, yeah, I said thanks and all. shelter for all of eternity, that is. eternity? no, I gotta get going. but thanks anyway. as you wish. hey, could you help me open this door? it's stuck. it's not stuck. it doesn't open. what? but I just came in through that door. yes. it only opens one way. you mean. . . you have found it: refuge for your eternal soul. my soul, fine. but what about my body? just part of the deal, I suppose. can't be helped. you're shitting me. right? no. your soul now belongs to me, in perpetuity. who the hell are you, man? you're not. . . oh yes, I am. exactly who you think I am. ha ha. oh jesus christ. I'll put in a good word for you, next time I see him. you see him? you? oh yes, on the golf course. all the time. that's. . . comforting, somehow. I thought you'd think so.

how are your experiments coming, herr doktor? excellent, my boy. I've finally perfected the formula. wow, that's great, doktor! what's next? I need a human subject to complete the tests. where are we going to find one? I already have, my boy. he he. oh? who is it? just sit over here, please, and roll up your sleeve. ok. are you checking my blood pressure? what? oh, yes. yes, your blood pressure. ha ha. doktor, that looks like a syringe. am I getting an injection? yes, yes. now hold still. there. now we wait. wait for what, doktor? to see if the formula takes effect. the formula? you just injected it into me? yes yes. now be quiet while I monitor the results. but what's it going to do? am I going to die? die? no no, my boy. you won't die. far from it. oh, that's a relief. no, you'll be walking on 6 legs, but you won't die. 6 legs? are you shitting me? unless of course you start to breed other cockroaches. cock. . . then I'll have to exterminate you. naturally. what?! can't have a bug-infested laboratory, now can I? no, you can't. . . I guess. after all, there's the scientific method to consider isn't there? yes, of course.

tired yet? no. me neither.

lord, are you busy? hello archangel. these humans have gone and done it. done what, lord? managed to piss me off. well, some of them have. let me guess. the evangelical politicians? you got it. I'm no bleeding heart liberal, but jesus. you invoke his name? well, I have to. especially because they invoke mine. they do that, don't they. yes, a lot. and for the most bullshit reasons, too. what are you going to do? I've sent them a warning. just a little storm, is all. you are pissed, aren't you? an angry god is not a pretty sight. it's very cool from where I'm standing, though. grab some popcorn. the show's just starting. awesome, lord.